christmas | part two

Christmas morning at home. I don't even know how long I have been dreaming of this very thing. A morning in our own house, where our girls wake up to a pile of presents under the tree. Where we gather in our jammies, hot coffee for Ryan and me, and open new toys without the fear of losing important pieces in someone else's home. It is such a simple thing and it definitely was my most favorite part of the holiday this year.

Of course, such perfect dreams always come with some hiccups. Laci was too cranky to open presents when she first woke up. So, I started breakfast for the family that would be joining us, and distracted Mia from the gifts under the tree with breakfast sausages.

Grammy tried her best to talk Laci into a better mood.

I even let her open one present before breakfast, a special gift for puppy Rose.

It produced a suppressed smile. You can just barely see it in the corners of her mouth.

I spent two hours in the kitchen that morning making biscuits, sausage, gravy, and fried bread dough. It all turned out pretty good and I made notes for next year - MORE gravy! Laci eventually snapped out of her bad mood, just in time for Mia to show what happens when she doesn't get enough sleep and is completely overstimulated.

We distracted her with some new toys, but you can still see the tears on her cheeks. She went to bed shortly after this for a very early morning nap.

We were all full, tired, and grateful after the morning's festivities, but we managed to pull it together again for Christmas dinner with Ryan's family.

A few more pictures with the girls in front of the tree. Some were successful.

Others, not so much.

We snuck in a few more minutes of playing before heading out the door again.

Laci and Mia both enjoy spending time with family so much. Each aunt, uncle, cousin, and grandparent brings a unique, something special into their lives, and we are grateful to have so many loving people around us.

This has been a very special holiday season in my heart. I have enjoyed being in our own home and I really loved seeing Laci "get" the holiday, asking questions and getting beyond excited about the magic of it all.

It was truly a Merry Christmas.

christmas | part one

My tree is dying.  Just thought I would start with that.  It's what happens when Thanksgiving falls early on the calender and you hurry to put up a tree early, and then you wait four long weeks until Christmas.  The needles start to dry up and fall all over the floor, and you worry about turning on the lights when you're not home.  And yet, you don't want to take it down.  Well, at least I don't want to take it down.  It's so pretty, and so I'm dragging my feet about boxing up the ornaments and putting the season to an end.

So, let's see...Christmas happened.  We gathered, we ate, we opened presents.  We needed naps but didn't take them.  I have toys scattered around the house that haven't found homes yet.  As always, we had a nice time with family, enjoyed the excitement and the conversations and the food, and are now happy to return to boring, quiet life for a while.

Christmas Eve morning, the girls "helped" make pumpkin pies.  Even Mia sat on the counter, which is a pretty big deal for her.

I don't usually make the girls match, but I couldn't resist these dresses.  Despite many attempts, Mia would not put her bottle down, and puppy "Rose" could not be removed.  Rose is just another member of our family these days, you will see her a lot.

The girls opened their Christmas cans before heading off for family dinner.  Mia tried her best to open her can on her own and would have been happy to just get a can with a key for Christmas.  Pajamas aren't really very important to her.  And Laci informed me that she does not like her pajamas and has not worn them yet. I am doubtful if she ever will wear them since she is pretty stubborn, and I made the horrible mistake of buying purple instead of pink.  Seriously, what was I thinking?

I made another attempt at pictures before leaving for dinner, and was mildly successful.

Mia with her beloved can key.

And Laci showing her true colors.
Silly.

Sillier.

And back to serious.

They refused to pose together.


We ate Christmas Eve dinner with grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins, and I attempted our annual cousin photo. (2011 is here, 2010 is here).

These kids are quite a bunch.  I finally busted out the flash just to get a clear shot, which could lead me into a too long discussion about why I hate using my flash, but how I also hate that I just plain didn't have enough light to take a decent picture all night, and I had a terrible time setting my white balance, which is why all my pictures are gross and yellow, but I'll spare you the details.  Instead, I'll just say, Exhibit A (above) no flash, Exhibit B (below) flash, you decide.

Oh, and the presents.  Lots of presents.  Our kids are so spoiled loved.

We stayed up too late, which made for an interesting Christmas morning, complete with a moody three year old and a mega meltdown from Mia.  Perfect beautiful memories.  But I will save that for part two. Stay tuned.

our early christmas gift

My head is still swirling from Christmas and our kiddos need to detox from too much sugar, too many toys, and not enough sleep.  But, before I get to blogging about our awesome Christmas, I want to share someone who made her appearance a little earlier than planned.  It seems she didn't want to miss out on Christmas, and who could blame her.

Meet my sister's new baby, born December 22 in the early, early morning,

Miss Harper Ann

It was very special to be able to witness little Harper's first cries, which sounded more like a baby cat than a human baby, but we love her just the same.  In fact, Laci may like her more because of it.  Mia loves her as well, just as long as she isn't being held by Grammy or Papa.  Mia is happy to share her momma with her new cousin, but definitely not her grandparents.  Eventually, I know they will be best friends.

My grandma and Harper

And I hope my sister doesn't mind me posting this picture of her, I just think she looks so beautiful.  She is adjusting to new motherhood very well, and I'm so proud of her.

Did you get a special gift this year?

all I want for christmas

It took me three years to realize Laci's thumbs are double-jointed, notice the crooked looking thumb in the picture.  I checked Mia's little fingers and thumbs that same day.  It only took me a year to realize Mia is also double-jointed, not just her thumbs, but every little finger, too.  I'm two years ahead of the game with her.  And to think, I'm constantly telling Laci to pay attention.

Last Monday (a week and a half ago now), we took the girls out for pizza. After dining for over an hour with the two slowest eaters on earth, we bundled up in the car and drove around town looking for the best Christmas light displays. We found some good ones, some mediocre ones, and one amazing one synced to music. I won't lie, I parked there for fifteen minutes because I wanted to see what the next song would look like. It was the best hour ever spent in the car with my kids. Even Mia was excited about the lights, as she pointed with her fingers and made happy grunty noises.

Now, every time we get in the car, Laci asks to see Christmas lights and it usually isn't difficult to convince me to detour from our regular route in order to see a few brightly lit yards. "Now what window?" she asks after each house, making sure she doesn't miss any by looking out the wrong window. The season has become truly magical in her eyes and it is such a joy to watch.

The other night, we wrote out her Christmas wish list and this is what she asked for, in her own words:

Walking toy puppy
Pretend toy dog bones
Puppy treats, pretend ones
Dog food and water
Pretend doggy toys

Are you catching a theme here?

Then she added a "quab" (quad).
And paper for painting.

Since Mia isn't big enough to speak for herself, I asked Laci what Mia would want.

Apparently, Mia wants a real doggy and doggy toy.

I asked her if Mia would like a spaceship, because I like to ask weird questions just to see how she'll respond.

"Yes! But not a real one, a pretend one."

Well, that's good because I don't know where to get a real one.

Of course, if you asked Mia, I think she would say the only thing she wants for Christmas is to make sure no one takes her french fries.

I can't wait until Christmas morning when, hopefully, all her little wishes come true. Well, except for the quad thing and the real doggy thing. But the rest, I can deliver.

And tonight, I have a date with a glass of wine, a warm fire, and some wrapping paper. I think I'm finally done shopping and I'm ready to get this holiday wrapped up. Literally.

What do you want for Christmas?

"i want to go to school"

On our way to the post office today, we passed a school during recess.  There were little kids running, swinging, yelling, and playing.  Laci asked, "What's that?"

"A school," I told her.

"I want to go to school!" she announced.

She announced it five more times in the car, a couple of times in the post office, and at least once more on the way home.

"When you get a little bit bigger," I explained to her.

"But I AM getting bigger," she insisted.

And she is getting bigger.  Everyday.

It was our decision to not send her to preschool this year.  A decision I'm glad we made.  She has plenty of years ahead of her to spend in a classroom, but for now, I want her to be little.  I want her to play and snuggle with her momma.  I want to protect her innocence.  I want to be selfish and keep her for my own, just a little bit longer.

***

A woman in line at the post office was making conversation.  I'm not really good at that talking-to-strangers thing.  My mom is a whiz at that, she can make a friend anywhere.  This woman mentioned, "It's so sad about that school."  I didn't really know what to say, except to agree.

I thought about how everyone is thinking about "that school" right now.  How I thought about "that school" just moments before when Laci was so adamant about going to school, too. Like so many others, I sat glued to the TV on Friday, hearing the story of the students and teachers at Sandy Hook Elementary School.  I'll admit I cried, on more than one occasion.  I felt sad, and angry, and physically ill at the loss of those little lives, as well as the adults that were taken.  I tried to imagine what those parents must be experiencing, but it is impossible to really KNOW until you have been in those shoes.

I had planned a post for last Friday, something about Laci's wish list for Christmas, but it felt too light-hearted on such a sad day.  I remember when Mia was born and very sick, when we weren't sure if she were going to live.  Time stopped for me.  My life existed only within the confines of that hospital and nothing else seemed to matter except that my baby was still breathing.  But on the outside of that hospital, life kept going for everyone else.  It was very strange to feel so separate from a world that I was very much a part of. And while my experience is nothing near as difficult as what those parents are going through, I can imagine they feel the same way.  Life for them has stopped for a bit, and will never, ever be the same again.  But the rest of the world must carry on, time won't wait.  I truly hope they are finding the peace and courage they will need to pick up the pieces and carry on.

I wonder how long it will take for this most recent tragedy to become dim.  It is still fresh news, and has already become the means by which so many are pushing their own agendas.  More gun control.  Less gun control.  Health care reform.  President this.  Political that.  It makes me kind of sick.  I stopped reading my Facebook feed because I couldn't take how impersonal it had become.  I would venture to say that not a single one of those parents is questioning the politics of this country.  It is much more likely that they are clinging to whatever spiritual beliefs they hold and digging deep, through prayer or meditation or whatever they believe, to find a way to survive and heal.  It would be nice if the rest of America would give them the space to do just this.

I had never intended to make this post so long, or that I would share my opinion so openly, but there it is.  These words have been forming in my head for several days, and for whatever reason, have found their way here.  It isn't nearly as eloquent or concise as I had imagined, but I have little time for editing and proofreading.  It has been a long week, with many ups and many downs, aside from the school shooting, and I'm just trying to sort through it all.  Most of all, I'm very thankful right now for two innocent little girls who are oblivious to the terrible things that can happen, and when I'm feeling uncertain, I can look in their eyes and see what pure innocence, honesty, and love look like.

What helps you through difficult times?