It's been ten whole days since I've sat at my computer. Well, except for one day last week when I was forced to pay bills, but that doesn't count. Life is just flying by, I can barely keep up. The holiday, family time, house building, excruciating heat...all combined to keep me from having any quiet, peaceful, climate controlled time to myself for over a week. But I have time now...maybe even more than a minute...and I'm taking full advantage of the opportunity.
This time, it's an opportunity to show off my little girl. Who is growing up so fast. Who brings me so much joy and so much exasperation, sometimes at the same time. Who is independent, feisty, sweet, funny, smart, and sometimes mean.
She'll be a big sister soon. It's hard to believe when she is still such a baby herself. I know it will be the best thing to happen in her little world, even though I'm sure she won't agree at first. We talk about "baby sister" in my tummy all the time. She pats my tummy, gives it hugs and kisses, and plays with my belly button (which is a little weird). Sometimes when I ask her where her baby sister is, she pats her own tummy, then laughs because she knows she's just being silly. And even through all the talking about baby sister in my tummy and coming out to play, I know she has absolutely no clue what is about to happen. No clue at all. It will be an interesting adjustment time for us all.
She's trying her best to talk more. Her vocabulary gets bigger everyday, although it still sounds like gibberish to the untrained ear. Even to my trained ear, I often find myself looking at her with a blank stare wondering, "What on earth do you want?" when she thinks she's clearly stated her needs.
Her birthday is over a month away, but the "terrible two's" have been alive and well in our house for months now. Despite her age, she is two in every way, complete with tantrums, defiance, and a giant attitude. She tests my limits multiple times per day and thinks it's hilarious when I get angry. When she glares at me (which happens often on bad days), I can't help but see a little mirror image of the angry face I must be making back at her.
Nearly every night, just as we have since she was born, we snuggle in the brown rocking chair. She drinks her sippy of milk, and I sing a few songs in a voice that only she can appreciate. Then, I am able push aside all my frustrations from the day, smell her clean hair, and stroke her soft skin. My lap is getting smaller by the day, and depending on how baby sister is positioned at the time, rocking is easier some nights than others. But the past few nights, I've really be cherishing our quiet time together in the dark, knowing that our moments together like that won't be as frequent once sister arrives.
You'd never tell it from these pictures, but she's a big ham...always looking for some attention and a laugh from her audience. Her personality grows everyday. Such a big personality in a tiny, little package means there is rarely a dull moment in her presence.
She made me a mama, although she prefers to just call me "mom," or more accurately, "Mom!" Yes, most often, my name is being called loudly, but she is part Silva and frankly, everything a Silva says is spoken loudly, so I'm sure she can't help it. She challenges me daily to be the mom she needs me to be, and I really try my best, hoping that I'm doing enough, that I'm patient enough, that I have it in me to take care of two fragile little beings when one is sometimes enough to make me crazy.
And if you can't tell, I'm totally smitten with her, and so is her dad, and her grandparents, and her aunties, and well, pretty much everyone she meets. You just can't help it.
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